Symptoms

Symptoms

1. Having trouble sleeping sleeping at night
2. Staying up really late (usually don't fall asleep until between 2:30-3am)
3. My body is very tense, especially in my shoulders/upper back
4. Occasional mood swings
5. Not eating at regular intervals
6. Exhibiting reclusive behaviors; highly introverted
7. Very picky about my choice of company

 There are things I want to do [and experience] with others, but I often feel void at times or alone or without people who I'd consider close to me in this new environment.  At times, I am overly anxious to the point that I just don't end up doing what I originally set out to do or what I said I would do.  My actions are somewhat that of someone with a settling mentality.  I honestly don't know why all of a sudden this persona decides to come to life.  I recognize that quiet time is very important, but having too much of it may be a slight problem for me.  The phases come and go where I'd like to be around people or not (please refer to symptom #7). 

I want things done my way or done in a very specific manner.  No complaints are coming from my mouth.  I'm just a very vulnerable, confusing, stressful, and tiring point in my life.  I have no time for BS, and I'm at a major crossroad with my relationships, including the newly found ones with others.  The only way for me to solve these problems is with spiritual enlightenment and actively seeking truth in the Word.  I realize that I need to seek Him more often.  I want to know what love is and what it means to love others unconditionally, and to really be kindhearted and giving to those who may be less fortunate.  I want to have my spirit filled with joy 24/7 and help others receive the same level of joy in their lives.  My thoughts have been so wrapped up in worrying about the happenings of the world, rather than getting myself (my mind, my body, and my soul) right and pleasing to the Lord.  My thoughts have been too consumed with worrying.  I shall not worry or have these ongoing fears.  He shall deliver me.  I pray everyday for the Lord to guide me, to renew my mind and my spirit, and give me the strength to do His will in my life.  I guess I just need to know whether I am making progress and making a difference (at least a conscious one).  Here at VT, I know I am here to serve one or many purposes.  I'm not sure what they are at this very moment, but as long as I trust in Him, He will open my eyes in time.  I just hate being in this down state.  It's so depressing.

Uplifting Scriptures

Proverbs 3:5-6 (NKJV)

5 Trust in the Lord with all your heart,
And lean not on your own understanding;
6 In all your ways acknowledge Him,
And He shall direct your paths.

Philippians 4:13 (NKJV)

13 I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me.

Psalm 23 (NKJV)
The Lord the Shepherd of His People
A Psalm of David.

1 The Lord is my shepherd;
I shall not want.
2 He makes me to lie down in green pastures;
He leads me beside the still waters.
3 He restores my soul;
He leads me in the paths of righteousness
For His name’s sake. 

4 Yea, though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death,
I will fear no evil;
For You are with me;
Your rod and Your staff, they comfort me.

5 You prepare a table before me in the presence of my enemies;
You anoint my head with oil;
My cup runs over.
6 Surely goodness and mercy shall follow me
All the days of my life;
And I will dwell in the house of the Lord
Forever.

Romans 12:1-2 (NKJV)

1 I beseech you therefore, brethren, by the mercies of God, that you present your bodies a living sacrifice, holy, acceptable to God, which is your reasonable service.
2 And do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind, that you may prove what is that good and acceptable and perfect will of God.