Spring Break 2014: A Momentary Reflection

You ever have one of those moments where you just want to curl up into a ball while sitting in the darkest corner just to shut out the rest of the world? That's exactly where I'd want to be right now.  I am feeling some kind of way and my mood has been utterly shot.  I'm very grateful for the time I was actually able to come home.  Most of my grad school friends were stuck on campus because either they were stuck working in lab, home is just to far away, or they simply had nowhere to go for spring break.  I'm fortunate to have found a way back my home sweet home.


On a scale of 1 to 10 in terms of level of relaxation, I would give my spring break experience a 6 out of 10.  I was really looking forward to spending time with family (check) and hanging out with friends I didn't get to see during winter break (not so much).  Everyone's schedule is so different and the worst part is so far, I haven't seen anyone besides my family.  I'm such a homebody, and sometimes it's not by choice.  It just sucks to me how every time I begin making plans, they all seem to fall apart. I'm like the only one who goes all in, 100%, then at the end of the day, no one can make it or something "comes up." Now I know how it feels to go to one of those schools that has spring break before the rest of the nation's universities.

Woe is me.  I will not play the victim, however I must recognize and understand certain patterns and avoid getting my hopes up high for a huge let down - which is something I'm personally notorious for letting happen often.  I believe I care too much, which is not a bad thing, but when it starts to take a huge toll on my emotional state, then it's a problem.  In a sense the only appropriate solution is to shut people out, put up my guards, not tolerate any mess, don't play any games, and get extra focused on the more important matters at hand.  It's my way of coping and if you happen to get left out of the loop, don't take it the wrong way.  I've got to do what's necessary to ensure that I am intact at the end of the day.

And on that note, hopefully what is remaining of my somewhat short spring break will be very positive, enjoyable, and more relaxing.